Sexual relationships are built on the pillar of love and affection, but it is imperative to mention that even and constant flow of loving energy is the most essential part to keep it going smoothly. A research study concluded that approximately 55% women who have married show a significant less interest in having sex with their husbands; similarly many men are also not interested in building sexual relations with their wives. The problem is the lack of interest in sex, not lack of sexual desire. Although the trend is observed in both males and females, but the percentage is a little higher in women. This article includes some of vital conclusive points regarding couples not interested in sex and what can be done.
Women Are Not Interested In Sex, Why?
1. Uncomfortable Sex
Vaginismus is a condition in which the muscles of lower pelvis cramp severely, making the intercourse extremely painful and sometimes impossible. Besides vaginismus, dry vagina can also cause irritation and pain, leading to lack of interest in sex.
2. Baby Delivery and Parenting
Arrival of a new child in the family is considered as one of the most common reasons for women being not interested in sex. The reason could be soreness due to the delivery stitches, exhaustion due to childcare or hormonal transition after parturition. Besides, breastfeeding after birth of the baby causes vaginal dryness and release of milk hormone prolactin that makes sex less attractive. A research study shows that 47% women are reported with low sexual desire that persists until 3 months of delivering the baby.
3. Hormone Factors
Peak testosterone levels in females are present during mid-twenties; but then the levels gradually decrease as one ages until menopause is attained. These low levels of testosterone decreases the sexual desire in females, making women less or not interested in sex.
It is also reported that the levels of androgens in females gradually decline as the age of the female increases, which directly affects the interest in sex.
4. Medical Conditions
Several medical conditions, such as depression, anxiety and stress, can affect the brain physiology and alter the level of sexual hormones in females, making sex less attractive. Some of the other illnesses not related to brainbut imparting effect on the sexual behavior include fibroids in uterus, endometritis, thyroid issues, etc.
5. Use of Medications
Women who use contraceptive pills are generally observed with low to no interest in sex due to high progesterone content in the pill. Besides, certain medications, such as blood pressure lowering agents and anti-depressants, can work to reduce the sex desire. They can alterthe amount of blood flow towards the reproductive and sexual organs, making women not interested in sex.
6. Lack of Connection Between the Couple
Connection between couples can be so much essential. Females are generally believed to be more sensitive. They need someone to listen to their problems even daily routine activities. When this connection of listening to each other breaks, women feel lonely, making them less or absolutely not interested in sex. The problem can be solved by talking to her, making her comfortable and asking her how she feels.
7. Physical Changes
The physique of the female's changes after having baby that makes her conscious that her husband is now less interested in her due to her uneven body structure. When this happens, the partner must affirm her and assure that she is still that beautiful.
8. Other Needs Need to Be Fullfilled
Multiple researches indicate that as the relationship time progresses, the desire of engaging in sex decreases in females, while the need for tenderness and communication increases. A male should reach out her emotional and physical tenderness, recognizing what her needs and wants are.
9. Tiredness
Being a female, either a working woman or mother, is quite tiring and time-consuming. A female may feel depressed at times because of workload or household chores. Encourage her to get some rest and help her with home chores to regain her interest in sex.
10. Too Focused on Being a Mom
After having a baby, a female is usually more focused on being a good mother rather than a loving wife. In this struggle of being perfectionist, the relationship of husband and wife is often lost. If a husband talks how he feels without pressurizing her, the relationship and passionate sex can be brought back in the relationship.
Men Are Not Interested In Sex, Why?
1. Pressure on Bed Performance
There is always a pressure on men to perform well in bed. Steady and highly active performance may not be achieved due to work stress and imbalance between performing well and the surrounding hindrances.
2. Excessive Alcohol Intake
Heavy alcohol intake can also cause loss of interest in having sex with the partner, as alcohol significantly reduces the levels of testosterone in the male body. Alcohol also affects the brain functioning which controls the sexual activity and desires.
3. Testosterone Levels
Similar to women, low testosterone is one of the common reasons that makes a man less or not interested in sex. Low testosterone levels are due to many reasons which can easily be identified through a variety of laboratory investigations and physical tests.
4. Increase in Weight
Increase weight in men causes increased production of hormone estrogen, which works against the testosterone. The higher levels of the estrogen in men, the lesser the sexual desire men will have in sex.
5. Effects of Pornography
Pornography trains the brain to be aroused and activated by seeing images not by the relationship. Men who are into pornography seem less interested in having sexual relationship with their wives.
How to Support You or Your Partner
A healthy sexual relationship is the need of every couple; it is not only a physical phenomenon but also provides emotional and mental affection and relief to both partners. Once the problem is identified, it is the responsibility of both male and female to help each other and build a satisfying relationship.
1. Try to Be Open Minded
It is noticeable that every individual is different from another. Husband and wife are not clones of each other that they will feel the same as one does. So you just need to be open-minded and understand each other's requirements according to time and situation. Give your partner a chance of improvement and adjustment.
2. Make Time Out
Most of the time, a couple cannot have enough love making time because of the children wandering around. Although everyone is so busy with their lives, set your priorities. Arrange baby sitter for one day a week or ask your mother or mother in law to take care of the children for one day, and then enjoy a dinner of you two. Just plan a romantic evenings!
3. Compromise and Communication
Communication and compromise are some of the most effective tools for making a sexual relationship healthier. Listen to the partner calmly and also discuss what you think. Do not judge or make critical reviews just by seeing the superficial things instead of clearing them.
4. Diagnosis of Medical Condition
As discussed above, there may be some medical conditions causing lack of interest in sex. It is better to rule out underlying disease and consult with the healthcare provider who can prescribe some medication as treatment.
5. Psychotherapy
More often, some psychological problems such as depression and stress make couples being not interested in sex. Then you may seek help from psychotherapy. You need to consulting with the psychotherapist who helps in dealing with the ongoing issue and rectifying them.
6. Find Counselor
An experienced counselor with enough knowledge about the sexual relationship issues can help with reverting the situation effectively. S/he may provide suggestion for issues associated with both male and female. Also, you two can get an objective view of your conditions.
Or both partners can try lifestyle changs, eating foods that can increase your libido, as well as finding out possible underlying medical conditions, which is explained thoroughly with words and videos by experts at MD-health.com. Click HERE for more.