What exactly is abstinence, and why does it matter? Abstinence means to make a conscious decision not to have intercourse with a partner until you are ready to do so. For some people, abstinence until marriage feels appropriate. For others, abstinence means avoiding sex until you find that special someone who has been with you for a very long time. In most cases, some people see abstinence as avoiding vaginal intercourse, which means that other forms of sexual play are fine. However, others may believe abstinence means no sex play at all. Regardless of which path you choose, there is little doubt that there are substantial benefits of abstinence that why most people do not regret their choices to abstain.
Benefits of Abstinence
What are the true benefits of abstinence? There are many! Here are several of them:
1. You Can Truly Focus on Your Partner
Sex might make you focus on the physical aspects of a relationship, but abstinence cuts through that and allows you to really get to know a person without the pressure of having sex with them. It can lead to longer, healthier relationships.
2. You Won't Have Regrets
All too often, sex means that someone will break up with you. This happens among teenagers far too often, and leaves someone wondering why they gave up something so important to someone who didn’t really care about them. Abstinence means no regrets about having sex too soon.
3. You Can Avoid STDs
If you choose to avoid sex play altogether, you are also avoiding the risk of STDs. Since sexually transmitted diseases and infections are on the rise, abstinence makes a lot of sense for your good health.
4. You Won't Get Pregnant
If sperm isn't getting anywhere near a vagina, there is no risk of pregnancy. One of the biggest benefits of abstinence is to eliminate your worry about what might happen if you or your partner gets pregnant.
5. You Can Have a Special Spousal Bond
If you choose to wait until marriage, you are saving something very special for the one person you want to spend the rest of your life with. Abstinence before marriage has been shown to make marriages stronger because both partners have something unique to share.
6. There Are no Awkward Questions
Too many couples find themselves upset when having "the talk" about sexual history. It is vitally important to know the sexual history of your partner, but what if your history is filled with sexual encounters? That can lead to awkward and even deal-breaking situations with your partner. Abstinence means no awkward questions because your response is straightforward.
7. Your Conscience Is Clear
If you choose to have sex with someone, you are becoming a part of their life forever. Even you two break up, you are still in his or her history. But if you choose to abstain and that person eventually moves on from you, your conscience will be clear – especially if you avoid taking the virginity of someone that you know will not be with you in the coming years.
8. You Learn Self-Control
It can be tough to avoid having sex, especially in the heat of the moment. One of the benefits of abstinence is to learn how to have self control during those times when you really want to do something, but know you should not.
9. A Healthy Religious Outlook
If you are a religious person, abstaining from sex until you are married might make you feel closer to your religion and your god. It can also help bring your partner into the fold and make him or her see the benefits of being a more religious person as well.
10. No Worries About Comparisons
One of the most heartbreaking parts of a relationship with someone who has a checkered sexual past is the feeling that you are always being compared to the previous sexual conquests. You are just one in a long line, and some of them might have been preferred over you! Through abstinence, you both come to the relationship free of those worries.
11. You Won't Have a Bad Reputation
When you do choose to have sex, one word whispered to a friend might eventually become gossip that spreads like wildfire. By abstaining, you never have to worry about earning a bad reputation for all the lovers you might have had. That can make you much more valuable in the eyes of discerning potential mates.
12. You Are Respecting Yourself
At the end of the day (or night!), you can look at yourself in the mirror and know that you held true to your beliefs and principles. This respect for yourself will go much further than sex; it will spread to other parts of your life and make you a stronger person. That's perhaps the biggest benefit of all.